Potpourri

Tata 2011

Yes, you are gone already but like every other year you were just there with me. I was still holding to you, I was stll talking with you through the office planner and wall planner, through memories and through my thoughts. Before leaving, you brought another year to us just like old tenants search e new one sometimes interms of good will with the land lord. Tata 2011. You were a very balanced year for me. You gave me 6 months of pure mommydom and 6 months of work. You fulfilled some of my long term dreams like visiting Provence and spending quality time with kids through the baking club. Just when I am saying you Tata (meaning good bye in Indian terms) I was wondering that we might have learned the word from the back of trucks which were only made by Tata company initially.

Chatter box 

J is becoming a chatter box.  I told this before right. Today we had to play "who can stay silent longer?" And of course she lost and we got atleast half an hour of silent zone! She is growing up in an environment of meetings, conferences, discussions etc. She and her friends are unknowingly including these terms and these culture in their playing.

A movie-Iti Mrinalini

This is a Bengali movie by Aparna Sen. Unfortunately I could not find any website of her in contrast to Mira Nair, another director, whose work I cherish. Aparna Sen lady holds a thought of pride in any Bengali womens' and in a few culturally aware Indians' hearts. I remember seeing her movie as a small child. The movie was called Paroma-I did not understand much of the movie then, but later I saw it again and many times and relished the intricacies of extramarital affair onscreen. I must say like Aparna Sen more as a director than an actress. Recently I have started liking her togetherness with her daughter. I like the way she gives, mingles and shares her life, her passion and her views with her daughter-Konkona Sen Sharma. Marvellous actress and  a very poised one. She can also give another dimension to an advertisement of a health drink.

Recent movie picturing the mother-daughter duo Iti Mrinalini  is a celebration of their togetherness. Many might find the movie a little slow and depressing but for me it is perfect. I liked the collage nature of the movie. Some pieces of which could have been bit more edgy considering life of a veteran actress as the story line.  I liked the scenes were mother and daughter were shown to singing together and the wall photos (used as decorative pieces) of both konkona and aparna were were mingling with each other in different shots of the film.

Another story between this mother and daughter was a movie called Titli.
J and I have seen that movie several times and we shared our own moments of togetherness singing the song "Megh peoner bag er bhetor..."from the movie.

Bridge

That day, in office we were talking about roots. There were actually very few who feel they belong to a place, most others have gone one or more relocations in life and have become a bridge since then. There are few who feel lack of identity due to rootlessness and few who have made peace with the moves and being bridge between two states, or communities, or countries. I am a root less person, I have gone through my bits of identity crisis. I have learned to define my identity in my words too. Home is not a fixed place for me, I make this wherever I go.

Words 


Many people around us believe that spoken words don't weigh anything. They just come out and vaporises. May be. I like words more than numbers and I give lots of importance to words which are said by others or by me. I try not to say anything if I don't mean it. I have never said or promised anything where I had doubts. I always say, "We will see" or " I will try". J used to get confused or frustrated at the age of 3 or 4 where she needed clear concepts. But I survived. Now J, in her 8, understands her mother's language and negotiates further according to her word skills.

Growing up


J turned 8 few days ago. She is growing up. Soon she will start walking her own path. She will not notice the clock when her mom will come back in the evening, and on some days she will not comment, "Hey mama, you are early today," with a golden smile.
I felt I have given enough of pencil, crayons, balloons and chocolates as return gifts in last birthdays and this time I decided to give fun and fresh air as return gifts after J's birthday party.

Struggle

J is struggling hard with her Hindi. I hope she will now pick the strings for writing Hindi. Being a mother I hate to see her struggling, but being a human I just am not strong enough to protect her from all the sufferings and struggles of life. I can just wish all the best for her. Earlier she struggled learning to skip, to bike, to speak and write English and so many other things. As a mother I really want to soak all the struggle from her life, but tomorrow I will not be there to do that for her, therefore may be it is better that she herself learn to soak them.

Being a mother


Is joy, happiness, patience, learning, power, responsibility, fun, irritation, helplessness, anger, struggle, dreams, selfishness, competitive,  comparative, understanding, challenging, balancing...
actually an intense full time job to do.

With this potpourri of thoughts I welcome 2012!

Dichotomy that continues

One morning in the news paper on the same page;

the dichotomy came alive;

Visit to the nearby fishing villages

Once upon a time, when we used to live in a small town, near north sea in Scotland, it was a Saturday morning, with no particular shopping, chores or things to do, or may be there were so many things to do that we were not bothering to start on something, progressing and finishing them. But on the other hand we were looking for an escape. An escape that won't cost extra, an escape that won't require planning, an escape that won't be indoor wandering inside a big building called a supermarket, an escape that won't be putting a DVD inside the box and watch it running for next 3 hours, an escape where we can relish all our senses. 

So, we started to think hard, I made two cups of Tea (Black one!) for us and gave a bowl of Cornflakes and milk to 'J' in between and started to think again. We thought this and we thought that. Then we decided why not we get dressed, walk to the nearest bust stop, buy a day long family bus ticket, travel the full route of the bus,  hop out whenever we feel like and hop in when we want to go to the next place.  That bus no. 95 took us to the nearby villages and we found so many gems, which I never bothered to care for and look around, before. And little I knew then, that particular day in my memory will be one of the most colorful and rich days for several months.

On the very picturesque way along the sea, we saw the fields laced with green plantation of corn and wheat. We found a wind mill far away standing alone near the sea,  we saw the metal crosses seeking out from the unknown churches belonging to small villages, where mostly the architectures are still kept like they were hundreds of years ago, mostly made up of stones.

First we went to a pottery shop, it was a nice little shop with nice cordial people, eager to show their things and tell about how they make them, but there was no air of competitiveness and ego. They have a small and steady clientele, and some times a tourist or two drop in their shop buy some small items, they don't want more than that. This pottery is run by a a family, a trend becoming so rare to see now a days. 

Couples;

 

Together they come

 

 They swing

 

They love differently the same thing

 

They are laid back at times

 

and focused some other time

Mostly contrast

and sometimes alike

 Sharp and salty is their type.

Respect, compatibility and laughter they seek;
Fights, misunderstanding, stress makes them weak;
What went wrong?  They think-

Suddenly;
A soft smile with a hug and a blink;
melts it all, 


With in no time they;
start again, to tick!

India: On the roads I

India is changing, very fast, impressions of changes are noticeable in every aspect of life. Returning to India after a long while, I am bound to notice those changes, in my last blog on home coming, I mentioned about me being in accommodating mode and not comparative with the life and living in Europe. I guess I was not right, I am still on comparative mode, but not with life in India and in western countries, but with India now and India then when I left it. Each and every day whatever I am doing or seeing, I am trying to remember was this there before when I left. There might be several post on this topic or might not be (even after writing for more than one year now in this platform, I cannot figure out which topic will trigger my writing, isn't it surprising how little we know about ourselves?). Roads are the interesting spots of India, people drive, people walk, people buy and sell things, people gossip, people demonstrate their happiness as well as anger, people fall in love but unfortunately some (or more correctly most) people break traffic rules (many never bother to know the rules actually) and therefore thousands of people die on the roads in India. 

In the first week after returning back to India, each day when I was going on the roads I was feeling a numbing sensation just as we get while riding a roller-coaster. That sensation is reducing each day. But my pulses still get high, specially with 'J' on my side.  Roads in India has definitely changed a lot, although it has not lost its intense character a bit. The color on the roads of India has increased in last ten years. Here are few glimpses.

The quality of roads in urban India have become  better, there are larger number of roads, they are broader too.  There are increased number of signals/traffic polices, sign boards, speed control boards, dividers, lane markers, street lights and so on. Also parking places where not that defined before and seldom there where paid parking lots, now parking places are well maintained and new urban planning does consider constructing parking lots underground of the supermarkets or big buildings.

Also there are tens of thousands of more numbers of cars, motor bikes and other kinds of two wheelers (with no gears), we in India, call them Scooty.  Although their numbers have increased but absolutely unchanged are the scenes of people riding the two wheelers without any helmet. Specially in middle sized, cities of India. In bigger metros, helmets are rule but in smaller cities it is still a will or whim of the rider. Although the traffic size has increased a lot, but people still don't acknowledge that, and keep taking life risks. Additional risk has been added by mass usage of mobile phones, on the roads. This was not there when I left India.

The conditions of Trucks for carrying goods and Government run Public buses have not changed in one decade. Though some buses run by private companies can also be seen. Three wheelers, we call them Auto, are special to India and other developing countries have remained same, only that the fare has increased few times. A completely unchanged phenomena is also the combination of heavy and light vehicles along with pedestrians and  hawkers on the same road.

The plackets and banners on two sides of the Indian roads has increased too, their get up has changed a lot. The topics of advertisement has changed too. Of course some advertisements reminds me of yester years, but most others shows the incoming of multinational brands and upcoming of many new retailers with great pomp into Indian markets, thus changing the eating, dressing and living style of common Indians.

On the road side, the bazaars in India used to be the major bazaars, but their popularity has reduced a lot, now the malls and supermarkets are in. Several retailers are cashing a lot by providing good quality products in reasonable prices, other attractions are availability of almost everything under one roof, fixed prices with good packaging and  controlled pleasant  temperature inside the supermarkets in contrast to the chaos on the road side bazaars. But road side bazaars are very much there, in last few days I have seen some of them, but the real big ones, I am still searching. Keep checking this blog, some day you will get photos of those vibrant markets too.

India means color to so many other part of the world, the roads of India definitely fulfill that definition. Only major concern amongst all these colors is the risk factor involved owing to high speed,  not following the traffic rules and extreme carelessness towards one's own life and others too.  Time has come to change our attitude on the roads, we want to develop very fast, and even faster we want to reach our destinations, but don't we know that it is better late than never?