Return to India - Its been a year

Diwali celebrations are in full swing all around. This reminds me that its been one year that I have returned to India for good.

Today when I look back to this year it has been, I can clearly visualise my journey back home and my takes on different phases of it. 

I was never in two minds for returning back to India after seeing and living in other countries while getting education and going through first phases of work life. When the opportunity to return actually arrived, it did put me in several minds. While living in Europe I have seen life of total independence, complete organisation, extremely selected social life and material high. Also that life was devoid of family members, festivals or just an overall feeling of living in my own country. After returning back I immediately realised that from now on life will be more threaded with relationships, less independent (social, economic and physical), less in comfort in terms of organisation or material but at the end of the day, with a cup of tea in my hand I found telling myself, yes this is India - this is the country which has given me a nationality and this is the country where we will not need any visa to live. This is the country where my family is rooted and this is the country where my daughter is trying to find a root. It was not an easy situation for me, and I guess for anyone who goes through similar changes in life.

And there you go - Here came the reverse cultural shock

First time, around ten years ago, when I went to a Durga Puja Festival organized by Bengali Associations in Frankfurt (Germany), I saw that the organizers; who were invariably 50-70 year old Indian expats were living in a euphoria. They were living in India which they left minimum 30 years ago. Unable to attain Durga Puja at home every year they decided to organize their own kind of Ghoroa (homely) festivity, where every one can participate in the preparation of the festival and all the professionalism can be kept little low. I was a student then, left India just one year ago, I found those people very unrealistic, I thought  of my parents as much liberal in thoughts than them, in spite that they spent their whole life in mofussul (small towns) of India and have not travelled outside India. I thought the senior Indian expats should understand that every country, culture and language should undergo changes to keep it going. Each generation should get a chance to dwell and put mark in their own cultures. I thought if Rabindragangeet and Najrulgeeti (two main streams of Bengali songs) are good then so are Jibonmukhi and Bangla bands (modern forms of Bengali songs), even my father would sometime humm the famous tunes of songs from Bengali bands,  but that group of expats did not accept that. For them, whatever was in India in their childhood were the best and all other things which happened to India after they left are bad, period. 

That day, I might have for the first time, subconsciously decided that I will go back, to my country, after some years. So then while living in Europe, in the following years when we went to the Durga Puja festival, we accepted and understood the emotional turmoils of the elderly expats. We talked with them a little and thanked them a lot for organizing such occasions were we could feel our roots, at least for a small while. After that we would search some people of our age and stage in expat life and would spend the day chatting with them, talking about Bollywood's latest release, Rituporno Ghosh's cinema, Sachin's batting, designer outfits and little bit about Germany's foreign policies and so on. And we always thought that actually we are keeping tap of what exactly is happening in India, in spite of living far away from it.

After ten years then, so when I decided to come back, I said to myself, that no I will not face any reverse cultural shock. I still can catch the beat of my India. I came back, dreaming of wearing those hand printed silk saris, gurjari salwar kameezes, accompanied with red/black/colorful bindis (that dot on the forehead of Indian women which makes her different from whole world) which I used to wear before leaving India, and which I could not wear in Europe most of the time because of cold weather and also to mingle with others in a foreign land. I knew exactly how I am going to fuse these traditional Indian styles with my new earned comfort feeling with jeans/westerns. During my short visits to India I knew that the dress sense of common Indian women are changing more towards western wears too, at least in urban India. So I would be able to blend myself perfectly both with east and west!

And there you go; how dare I to think that I still know the country which I left ten years before?

Of course it has changed, it has changed in ways that are not depicted in magazines or Bollywood movies, which we kept watching for last ten years. It has changed in those gullies where we did not sneak peaked when we came here for short visits. 

One change for good I am observing is that parents of today have (trying to) mostly come out of the rat race to make their children a doctors or an engineer, now there or many more options, so parents are little more relaxed, but another change is the brand consciousness developed along with increase in consumerism. It is new statement of India for me.

The concept of status, depends on the number of house maids you have, the school where you child is going and the brand and number of the car/s you possess was absolutely not there in the middle class society of India I used to live. Money was a necessity but it was a taboo to be discussed openly then, for sure among  the working middle class people of India, now the pay packages of kids and their spouses are a favorite topic of discussion in a group of people in their fifties or sixties. So in fact just like in Germany I was shocked to see how people of that age were still living in their old ideas, here seeing the same generations discussing so openly about money and materials is stunning me equally.

The idea of designing my outfits myself by going to a tailor who work at the corner of our street in a small shop is not their anymore, mostly everything is ready made, and branded garments have ranges for people who are  born or made  of certain sizes, and if you belong to the wrong side of those sizes, then it is a tough call . May be all Indian women are not going for  ready made attire but of course this is the growing trend, they are getting accustomed to it.

For first few days, most of the changes I was noticing was centered to women, first I being one and second women have attained a lot of space for them in India in last ten years. They are the buzz word for new India. They are the targets for shopping malls, movies, schools, day care centers, cosmetic and technology industries, hospitals. But then slowly on turning my focus to the Indian men I found them changing too, and that too for a good, you can see them smilingly taking the back seat in the two wheelers, you can see them pushing the perambulators in the parks, you can see them putting the washings on the wash lines, you can see them regularly going to drop and pick their kids. You can see them standing in front of the fitting rooms in the shopping mall waiting with extra dresses for their partners to try on. You can see them not trying to ask their female colleagues about their partners on first meeting. But please don't think all men have become so sober in India, but of course they are changing subtly, slowly, steadily. And again this is about men belonging to a very narrow range called middle class India.

So I am trying to surf through the waves of reverse cultural shocks, I am trying to tap my shocks away standing in a corner with the beats of recent Bollywood releases, while watching my Indian contemporaries doing rain dance under man made sprinklers, a fun theme grew here while I was away.

Bedtime conversation

 'J' is going to her new school for a week now. She is getting up every morning without complaints and coming back every afternoon with a smile on her face. She likes the bus journey also. What else can her mum want?

As she is little behind in her maths (she was learning time and money there but here they are teaching division before going to time, minor differences among different schools) and as she is learning Hindi from zero, so there are few pages of home works every day. We tackle with those together (mummy, daddy and 'J') in the evening. By the time 'J' goes to bed, she gets tired and the clock denies any time for bed time story (used to be our strict ritual previously). Anyway, we both agree to the fact that after few days, we will be able to start that once again (I doubt though, considering her school timing and time being eaten up in her daily commute to and from school, anyway lets see). But we still talk a bit before she dozes off. As I feel this is the most relaxed time for both of us and this is the time when she opens up completely. I generally let her talk and resist asking much questions, she opens up,  I just listen her chattering. This is the time when I get to see her real self.

Yesterday, I asked her whether she has a story time in their class? She yawned, but she wanted to talk too. She said "No Mama, here there is no story time or golden time (where a child can choose what they want to do between reading storybook, art, computer and play), no project or drama. Everyday it is the same as is written in the Almanac (what we used to call school diary). Maths, Hindi, English and EVS (Environmental Sciences)." I asked "What about the computer class (before her admission we were shown a computer room in the school with many computers), that must be fun?" She replied "Oh! today computer teacher said computers are not working so we learned computer in our book."I asked "'J' did you have art and craft today?" As I know this is her strong interest, she said that she liked and made a greeting card using her own art things (this is new to her as previously the art and craft material were provided be her school and so there were ample varieties of types of coloring medium, papers and brushes or pencils).

I know her time table, it is given in her Almanac (what we used to call school diary). And there are music, library, drawing, computer, games  and yoga classes one at each day of the weak along with Maths, Hindi, English and EVS (Environmental Sciences). But still I asked her as story time, golden time project and drama were in her previous school curriculum in UK besides art and craft, sports, music, English and Mathematics. Children were very fond of story time and golden time as their imagination was harnessed in these times. We all know that they love to imagine, pretend and dream. The class rooms there were divided into special corners where they can make models with Lego blocks, do jigsaw puzzle or make models using cardboard  or other materials, no not only in lower primary but in higher classes too. Kids were more mobile (always in organized manner though) and they did not need to sit at one place all the time. The tables and chairs were arranged so that 4-6 children sit with each other face to face and do their work as a team and not always as an individual. Here 'J' is little sad as they are supposed to sit in their class all the time except for morning prayer and games/yoga/mass PT time. Art and craft, lunch, music everything is done on her desk.  Also the tables are arranged in rows so she always need to look at the board, turning back or leaning forward is not a good manner, she knows that. Also she seemed to be little bored as everyday it is same thing going on, teachers coming in class, opening the text books, reading something, writing something, copying the home work from blackboard. I guess she is lacking the surprise element which her class teacher used to create in Scotland, a little introductory story before starting a topic, involving the kids by asking them what would they do if they were born in Roman period and so on. Kids were encouraged to bring materials /books from home which can be helpful for the topics being discussed at school. Like if they are studying about water animals at school then kids can bring some plastic toys they have at home. They were encouraged to show that to the class with proper explanation hence opening them to public speaking. The focus was more on creating interest towards a topic and then letting kids free to figure out how much information they want to collect and how much they want to memorize. Here the focus is restricted to the few pages of the textbooks, spellings, learning the facts, writing them down in question answer, finishing the syllabus every year. While in Europe syllabus was a broad concept to be completed in five years of primary schooling. I am not dead against of the system in India as I myself had same kind of education and the repetitiveness of reading, writing and Mathematics is essential for grasping education in a languages which are not our mother tongue (English or Hindi is not mother tongue of most Indians)  and also in India the books the materials were not in plenty even few years ago, but I was just wondering if kids can explore little more and let their curiosity expand, will that not be even better? 

These were all the thoughts going through my mind as I was listening to 'J' speaking. But then the clock was ticking, so I told her" 'J' now you should sleep, otherwise  you will miss the school bus tomorrow." She said "Yes, Mama." I kissed and hugged tightly my newly obedient child  and put off the lights.

India: Fusion is fashion as always, now even more

Just  as I said before (see the blog about Roads of today's India) I am trying to visualize India I left each and every day now when I have returned to India after a long while.

Fusion; has remained a favorite word in Indian fashion, cuisine, language, interior designs or in our complete living style.  Fusion is unavoidable considering the diverse cultures we have inside India and the invasions India has faced in history by Turkish, French, Dutch, Portugeese and British mainly and the influences India has gathered from neighboring countries like Srilanka, Maldives, Burma, China etc,  fusion ought to be the buzzword of Indian mentality. 

Just considering the fusion in food today, as I consider for me food is a mirror of culture, changes and revolution going inside a country very subtly. The geographical, economic, political and cultural aspects of a human society can be portrayed very vividly just by considering the food eaten in that society. And speaking only of me food for me is not a necessity, it is a luxury, an indulgence, a hobby or a simply a way of life actually. I know you will brand me as a unfashionable glutton as boasting about food does not suit a woman of modern society, but then who cares!

I personally feel that we love the taste of food which we grow up eating, as youth though we venture out to different tastes and flavors but with age we grow a distinct choice which majorly consist of the childhood flavors. Then we say that our cuisine is the best in the world. Sometimes  we don't like some taste, just when we try them for the first time, but a constant exposure to that taste, grows a liking towards that food in our minds. I did not like several tangy, strong flavored cheese for the first time I went to Europe but then slowly I started liking them.

We the children of seventies don't see noodles (specially maggi-made famous by nestle), dosa-idly, (snacks from south of India) dhokla or bhujia or pav-bhaji (snacks from west of India), chola-bhatura or tandoori chicken (snacks from north of India), rasogolla (sweet from east of India) as any thing new, we have grown up eating although we knew that they are from different parts of India, but if we just walk one generation back to our parents, they were not that aware of these food if they did not belong to that area. Cake, pastry, biscuits, puffs were also looked upon as western influence by our grandparent's generation but then it mingled quite nicely in the platter of next generations of India.

So what has changed in that scenario in last 10 years? Oh a lot has changed! 

 

Courtesy-Google images

Actually for all those Indians who are living outside India for a long time and have got used to of French wine,  Cheese from Holland, Breads from Germany, Chocolates from Switzerland, Olives and Coffee,  Hummus from Oriental countries, Puddings from UK and big pieces of Chocolate chip cookies, Mexican cuisine and other fast food from USA and who also care a lot for their Indian meal of rice, hand made chapattis and dal (legume soup) and aam ka achhar (mango pickle), India is coming up fast to cater for them.

When I left India, cheese meant only of one kind made by Amul and the cottage cheese, which we call paneer. But on returning back I see that several cottage industries are coming up with India's own fusion version of European and American cheese.

Wine meant an imported luxury 10 years ago, I first got a taste of wine when  one of our seniors  from Kolkata went to Italy for an academic visit and brought a bottle of wine, I was twenty one then. But now the western ghats of India is producing wine, of course the actual wine experts pursuing these industries  are still from abroad but Indians are able to get wine produced in Indian soil. Beer is also produced in India and is being exported also.

Fruits like strawberries, Wine grapes, Kiwis etc are grown here in several farms every year, they all started as test farming and then became successful business, all in last 10 years, when I was not here. After all many hundred years ago Chili pepper, potato, tomato (even now it is called bileti begun - Foreign Aubergine/Brinjal by my grand mother), Cauliflower, Cabbage, French beans, capsicum or green peppers, Melons, Dry fruits like Walnuts, Apricot etc were introduced to India by Turkish or British people. Now Chili has become symbol of India! 

Now if we come to the restaurants, oh there are plenty of them who want to satisfy the western appetite of their clientele.  Unlike the majority of restaurants a decade ago which used to serve a mixed platter of Indian cuisine heavily loaded with regional influences with some special cakes as dessert the restaurant now are more specialized (just like the professions). Many restaurant can be seen who offer only continental cuisine or only oriental cuisine, also there are places who offer fusion cuisine to attract specifically big groups (like office parties) where foodies of all tastes can get their pick.

I should also mention that earlier India was divided into north and south in terms of cuisine. Northern cuisine had strong Punjabi influence (effect observed after partition of India and Pakistan when many people from Punjab part of Pakistan came to India and found home in several parts of India). South Indian cuisine was popularly coined as Madrasi khana (food from Madras) by the North Indians (I guess Madras being the oldest metropolitan of the south, and the name was given by British officers, who changed names of many cities of India according to their own ease of pronunciation). Now restaurant chains are build who offer the fine cuisines of each small  food wise rich regions of India and new names of cuisines like Bengali, Awadhi, Udipi, Chettinad, Goan, Rajasthani, Gujrati, Maharashtrian etc. This list will keep enriching as Indians are increasingly leaving their own states and going to other states for studies, work, business or just because they want to wander in all over India and many small uninteresting pockets of India are getting exposed due to increasing industrial, educational, tourism and real estate business, so the culture and habits of those pocket are oozing out too.

Snacks, used to be mainly of Indian origin, when I was in college, with some companies producing Indian version of puffs called patties and cream loaded cakes (owing to strong British influence) but now world masters like Mc Donald's, KFCs, Subways etc are visible in big and medium sized cities of India, although they have tweaked their menu for Indian taste (little more spicy, pork and beef are not that readily available). 'J' was very excited to go there for the first time but then she was utterly disappointed on testing her well known burger which was having a splash of chili chutney!

 

Courtesy-Google images

Fruit juices, constitute a main part in Indian lifestyle, specially during summer, but I was used to drink freshly prepared juices from road side vendors, now increasing concern about germ free drinking water and availability of tetra packs has increased the availability of packaged juices from companies like Tropicana and Rubicon in Indian supermarkets as well as departmental stores. 'J' who is used to of having a pack of juice in the refrigerator is happy to get her favorite mango/apple flavor in India also.

Packed and dry food like Muesli, Instant Oatmeal, Cornflake, Olive oil, different kinds of pastas, Pasta sauces from well known brands like Kellogs, Quaker (Pepsi co)  Barilla,  Knorr are easily available in supermarkets and actually some cities have special departmental stores selling them.

Chocolates meant Cadburys to me, but now although Cadburys hold a major share but  Lindt , Ferrero and Mars are also available. To 'J''s delight her favorite Kinder eier (egg-surprise egg) produced by Ferrero which is actually an egg shaped chocolate with an yellow yolk shaped plastic box inside which contains funny little toys, each time a different one (to keep children and adults curious)  is also available here now. They have changed the packaging and taste though to customize with Indian heat and taste, but the surprise little toys are still there which I guess  is main attraction for 'J'. Chocolates were not famous confectionery before, they were only kid's happiness, but now small chocolate boutiques are visible on many corners where chocolates are prepared by the owner with infusion of local tastes like cashew nuts, almonds and figs and sold with special wrapping and smile, just as in small villages of Europe. These chocolates are entering fast into the adults life where Indian sweat meats were observed before. A packet of locally hand crafted chocolate with a bottle of wine is a common gift of today's guest to their hosts.

Among all these changes and fusion (and sometimes confusion due to excessive choices in front of you), I am glad there is one thing which has remained same from my grandfather's time to now in 'J's world, and undoubtedly all four generation of us love to drink that. That is nothing other than  the coconut water just directly from the green coconut with/out a straw. Aah! this is a must in Indian tropical climate and will  remain there as raw as it is in spite of all other changes.

India: On the roads I

India is changing, very fast, impressions of changes are noticeable in every aspect of life. Returning to India after a long while, I am bound to notice those changes, in my last blog on home coming, I mentioned about me being in accommodating mode and not comparative with the life and living in Europe. I guess I was not right, I am still on comparative mode, but not with life in India and in western countries, but with India now and India then when I left it. Each and every day whatever I am doing or seeing, I am trying to remember was this there before when I left. There might be several post on this topic or might not be (even after writing for more than one year now in this platform, I cannot figure out which topic will trigger my writing, isn't it surprising how little we know about ourselves?). Roads are the interesting spots of India, people drive, people walk, people buy and sell things, people gossip, people demonstrate their happiness as well as anger, people fall in love but unfortunately some (or more correctly most) people break traffic rules (many never bother to know the rules actually) and therefore thousands of people die on the roads in India. 

In the first week after returning back to India, each day when I was going on the roads I was feeling a numbing sensation just as we get while riding a roller-coaster. That sensation is reducing each day. But my pulses still get high, specially with 'J' on my side.  Roads in India has definitely changed a lot, although it has not lost its intense character a bit. The color on the roads of India has increased in last ten years. Here are few glimpses.

The quality of roads in urban India have become  better, there are larger number of roads, they are broader too.  There are increased number of signals/traffic polices, sign boards, speed control boards, dividers, lane markers, street lights and so on. Also parking places where not that defined before and seldom there where paid parking lots, now parking places are well maintained and new urban planning does consider constructing parking lots underground of the supermarkets or big buildings.

Also there are tens of thousands of more numbers of cars, motor bikes and other kinds of two wheelers (with no gears), we in India, call them Scooty.  Although their numbers have increased but absolutely unchanged are the scenes of people riding the two wheelers without any helmet. Specially in middle sized, cities of India. In bigger metros, helmets are rule but in smaller cities it is still a will or whim of the rider. Although the traffic size has increased a lot, but people still don't acknowledge that, and keep taking life risks. Additional risk has been added by mass usage of mobile phones, on the roads. This was not there when I left India.

The conditions of Trucks for carrying goods and Government run Public buses have not changed in one decade. Though some buses run by private companies can also be seen. Three wheelers, we call them Auto, are special to India and other developing countries have remained same, only that the fare has increased few times. A completely unchanged phenomena is also the combination of heavy and light vehicles along with pedestrians and  hawkers on the same road.

The plackets and banners on two sides of the Indian roads has increased too, their get up has changed a lot. The topics of advertisement has changed too. Of course some advertisements reminds me of yester years, but most others shows the incoming of multinational brands and upcoming of many new retailers with great pomp into Indian markets, thus changing the eating, dressing and living style of common Indians.

On the road side, the bazaars in India used to be the major bazaars, but their popularity has reduced a lot, now the malls and supermarkets are in. Several retailers are cashing a lot by providing good quality products in reasonable prices, other attractions are availability of almost everything under one roof, fixed prices with good packaging and  controlled pleasant  temperature inside the supermarkets in contrast to the chaos on the road side bazaars. But road side bazaars are very much there, in last few days I have seen some of them, but the real big ones, I am still searching. Keep checking this blog, some day you will get photos of those vibrant markets too.

India means color to so many other part of the world, the roads of India definitely fulfill that definition. Only major concern amongst all these colors is the risk factor involved owing to high speed,  not following the traffic rules and extreme carelessness towards one's own life and others too.  Time has come to change our attitude on the roads, we want to develop very fast, and even faster we want to reach our destinations, but don't we know that it is better late than never?